Fat Teddy
2003-10-04 06:13:31 UTC
The Ted Kennedy Sink Or Swim (SOS) Group is planning a barbeque and booze
bash on the shore of the Chappaquiddick Bridge to commemorate the
cold-blooded drowning of Mary Jo Kopechne.
There will be a booth set up on the shore where Ted's Oldsmobile went
airborne into the waters. In commemoration of this infamous day the
Democrats have hired a stunt driver to re-enact the shameful debacle. The
stunt driver will meet at a tavern just a few miles away and drink himself
into oblivion, get into a replica of Ted Kennedy's Oldsmobile, and drunkenly
drive off the bridge!
Of course the actor portraying Senator Kennedy will extricate himself from
the sinking Oldsmobile and hasten to safety on the far bank, leaving his
innocent passenger in the murky waters to drown. He will portray the Senator
in that the actor will drunkenly stagger from the scene and worry only about
saving his own ass while leaving his female passenger to fend for herself
while she gasps for air.
The actor, portraying Kennedy, will not notify the Police for at least 18
hours or more. This will allow the actor/Kennedy time to sober up so as to
avoid a drunken driving/manslaughter charge.
The Kennedy's will be serving hamburgers, gallons of tequila, Jello shots,
and quarts of rum and cola. Ted will be signing autographs (if he can walk)
on t-shirts emblazoned with the Oldsmobile insignia..
Unfortunately Ted's other brothers will be unable to attend but he will most
certainly uphold the family reputation.
WWF
It is rumored that Janet Reno may make an appearance in the WWF arena, but
this has not yet been confirmed. Reno's spokespersons have said that she is
scheduled to appear in a wrestling match against a tag team from Tucson, but
that has yet to be decided. Reno, as many know, is one of the more masculine
wrestlers on the scene and the rumor around the locker room is that she has
more balls than most of the guys. She certainly has more hair on her lip
than most men....
Janet will be working part-time making ice cream shakes....
bash on the shore of the Chappaquiddick Bridge to commemorate the
cold-blooded drowning of Mary Jo Kopechne.
There will be a booth set up on the shore where Ted's Oldsmobile went
airborne into the waters. In commemoration of this infamous day the
Democrats have hired a stunt driver to re-enact the shameful debacle. The
stunt driver will meet at a tavern just a few miles away and drink himself
into oblivion, get into a replica of Ted Kennedy's Oldsmobile, and drunkenly
drive off the bridge!
Of course the actor portraying Senator Kennedy will extricate himself from
the sinking Oldsmobile and hasten to safety on the far bank, leaving his
innocent passenger in the murky waters to drown. He will portray the Senator
in that the actor will drunkenly stagger from the scene and worry only about
saving his own ass while leaving his female passenger to fend for herself
while she gasps for air.
The actor, portraying Kennedy, will not notify the Police for at least 18
hours or more. This will allow the actor/Kennedy time to sober up so as to
avoid a drunken driving/manslaughter charge.
The Kennedy's will be serving hamburgers, gallons of tequila, Jello shots,
and quarts of rum and cola. Ted will be signing autographs (if he can walk)
on t-shirts emblazoned with the Oldsmobile insignia..
Unfortunately Ted's other brothers will be unable to attend but he will most
certainly uphold the family reputation.
WWF
It is rumored that Janet Reno may make an appearance in the WWF arena, but
this has not yet been confirmed. Reno's spokespersons have said that she is
scheduled to appear in a wrestling match against a tag team from Tucson, but
that has yet to be decided. Reno, as many know, is one of the more masculine
wrestlers on the scene and the rumor around the locker room is that she has
more balls than most of the guys. She certainly has more hair on her lip
than most men....
Janet will be working part-time making ice cream shakes....